I love that; as a society, we are coming to a place where we want to normalize things that should have never been judged as strange or taboo in the first place. One of those things is self-care. I am going to hop on the bandwagon and say, “let’s normalize balance and moderation.” Now, if you follow me on Instagram and have seen some of my “Wellness Wednesday” posts, you know by now that moderation is a word I love to use. If I’m sharing healthy food, I also share how it can be unhealthy if you overeat this particular food. If I share a wellness or self-care practice that works for me, I always give other options or state, “do what works best for you.” We all want to be healthier, feel better, and feel inspired. As we learn and grow individually, we must remember that balance and moderation will always serve us in the long run. 

 The concepts, rituals, traditions, religions, foods, and other things we incorporate into our lives are essential. They can hinder us or serve us in the best way, depending on how we want our unique wellness journey to look and feel. I’ve noticed how there has been a rise in the popularity of self-help books, weight-loss teas, fad diets, wellness influencers, and mindfulness gurus in the past decade. So many people are striving to enlighten themselves and are looking for ways to be well, which is admirable. That leaves lots of people taking in a slew of suggestions (most opinion-based) and information verbatim. This can get overwhelming when you’ve read many self-help books and possibly follow influencers who inspire you. You’re trying to take all of these fantastic things shared by others to incorporate them into your life. You are hoping to get a particular result, experience, or shift in your life like them. You aren’t them, though; that is where the issue lies for some. Even when we are beginning to seek and find new information, we must remember to practice finding balance and moderation as we sift through all we learn.

I can’t stress enough how beautiful and necessary it is to be able to learn from others. In the age of social media and so much information accessible to us on the web, I also encourage that we do our due diligence in researching things for ourselves. Many have a big platform yet decide to share specific content because it’s trendy and can help build social clout. I noticed an increase in this with celebrities during the pandemic who saw how well having a wellness or mindfulness angle brought to their page or channels can bring them lucrative opportunities with brands. I encourage learning new information, taking in views that differ from your own, changing your mind, challenging or questioning what people present to you, and breaking rules that never served you.

On the other hand, when you take in too many ideas and practices and try to incorporate them into your life the same way as the person who shared, you may find that “it doesn’t work.” Some may feel there is no way to implement “wellness” into their daily lifestyle consistently. The start of changing your life with the help and information shared by others requires your initial approach to be rooted in being mindful of what balance looks like for you and what things may or may not serve you. 

I can’t tell you how many tweets I’ve seen of people struggling to do a trendy ritual shared. They see others share how waking up at 5 am to incorporate several self-care practices all before work is terrific. This routine automatically is “supposed” to make your day better and more productive. Naturally, these people want in on this positive change. Many responses to tweets in this vein are “just stay consistent” or “it does help if you commit.” I don’t always think it’s folks failing to commit or them having a lack of consistency. I believe people do not understand themselves enough to know what self-care looks like for their specific personality and lifestyle. 

I don’t mean that to sound harsh. We forget we live in a capitalist society where so many of us (myself included) find ourselves being convinced or influenced if what’s presented sounds good and at least makes an iota of sense. We also tend to forget that though some things look a certain way for others, they may look entirely different for us. That’s okay. When I go to the replies on posts like this, I barely see responses like, “try waking up a bit later if you aren’t getting enough rest.” I’m not seeing “try exercising in the afternoon or after work, a 5-minute meditation during your lunch break, and journaling before bed if fitting everything into your morning is overwhelming”. So many of us are trying to focus on self-care and wellness by other people’s standards and schedules. It all starts and ends with understanding your balance and moderation. If you have 4 kids under the age of 8 and work in a boutique, why on god’s green earth do you think you should have the same self-care schedule as a YouTube influencer who has no kids and primarily works from home? Part of your self-care is making whatever you want to implement into your life beneficial to your well-being. Make it make sense for you. The math has to be mathin’!! Lol

 This topic of balance and moderation lacking in our lives falls into another area that seems to be rearing its ugly head currently. The ugly divisiveness in America and so many countries worldwide is alarming, and rarely can fruitful conversation be had. I have observed that the difference of perspective these days lives in the realm of extremes. Many of those extremes come from being easily influenced and not questioning information we get from the news or social media. As I said earlier, people not doing their due diligence to educate themselves with factual information can lead to blind faith in people, concepts, and ideas that sound convincing but aren’t rooted in anything other than opinion. 

I notice a massive lack of balance and moderation in thought and understanding from a vast demographic of people. I’m not even talking about just left and right political ideology. This extends into the wellness space and, I’m sure, many other areas outside of politics. I notice so many are so rooted in ego that they cannot hear a perspective that differs without completely bashing it and the person who relayed it. There is something almost violent (actually violent in some cases)  about a complete omission of nuance, the concept of multiple things being true, or even that solutions usually meet somewhere in the middle. I believe this gross negligence of balance in the consciousness and spirits of so many is leading and will lead to an even worse mental and emotional health crisis globally. 

People aren’t moderating what and how much of what it is they consume. They aren’t curating their timelines and feeds or gathering news from more than a few sources. These same types of personalities are not interested in balancing what they consume by trying to research or immerse themselves into any other reality or be amongst other people who may look and think differently. I am observing a societal problem that is overwhelming to witness at times. So much of this goes back to how I initially started. We have to make it our business to know ourselves, especially to connect and get to know one another. When we are well acquainted with ourselves, we notice when someone is trying to influence, lower our frequency, provoke, or persuade us. When that self-awareness exists, you are mindful that though you can learn and be inspired by what others share, how you internalize external factors and how you let them affect your thoughts and decisions is all up to you. We must understand that we have unique personalities, tastes, and sensibilities. Balance and moderation in all areas of your life are pivotal for your overall health and wellness. It’s your job to find balance in your life so you can be your best self for yourself and those around you.